How to spot...

A "PAGAN"



Clothes: Usually

Hair: Lots

Attitude: Martyred.

Music: Anything with "the", "burning" and "times" in it.

Film & TV: Anything about religion

Habbitat: Woodland, pubs, Hippy-shit-shops, pubs and pubs.

Food & Drink: Beer

Habbits: Complaining about Christian persecution, drinking, staying out late at night in woodland (don't ask).

Taste in men/women: Other pagans.

Accessories: Pentacles (pendants, earings, rings - well just about anything really), religious symbols, robes, candles, incesnse, really-big-and-old books.

Often says: "We are a proper religion you know", "... The-Burning-Times ...", "Actually Witches were hanged not burned, you know - except in Scotland of course", "Bloody New-agers", "Good beer, cheap too", "What are you doing for the Solstice?".

Never says: "We could learn a lot from the Christians", "No thank you, I'm teetotal" (except Neil), "Actually, I think the Newburry bypass is a God-send".